And what can I do other than wait till the Spring unravels itself more and more..
I know it utterly despairs me but I need to keep my patience to the limits, not pushing them harder and wishing for it to become extinct. Yes, I need energy. Coffee? I'm drinking like 4/5 cups per day. Energy drinks? Still not working. I need something much stronger to motivate me. I already have it in my heart. The only thing I need to convince is my brain. Or maybe vice versa? I really do not know what to do. It's like since I have heard smth that would separate me from my reality, my dreams have taken a different angle and I am totally misplaced.
Misunderstood as well, because I am still trying to do my best into paying attention to details.. which are.. uhm.. forget it! I'm a changed person. I want myself a little back in time, but then again, no!
Let me foresee the future and forget about twirling my hair.. Forget about my moody mood !
I want to reach the 'climax' of this education which I am in and think it is useless and meaningless to learn stuff I have already learned or know. I acknowledge I am in Dk and things stick different, but I need a sweet escape.. a pocketful of sunshine in my hands....
mmmm
And I am feeling clueless and fragile this time of the year.. although I am sure I will feel much better after I get some ZzzzZzz.
Good night !
XoXo,
R.
I know it utterly despairs me but I need to keep my patience to the limits, not pushing them harder and wishing for it to become extinct. Yes, I need energy. Coffee? I'm drinking like 4/5 cups per day. Energy drinks? Still not working. I need something much stronger to motivate me. I already have it in my heart. The only thing I need to convince is my brain. Or maybe vice versa? I really do not know what to do. It's like since I have heard smth that would separate me from my reality, my dreams have taken a different angle and I am totally misplaced.
Misunderstood as well, because I am still trying to do my best into paying attention to details.. which are.. uhm.. forget it! I'm a changed person. I want myself a little back in time, but then again, no!
Let me foresee the future and forget about twirling my hair.. Forget about my moody mood !
I want to reach the 'climax' of this education which I am in and think it is useless and meaningless to learn stuff I have already learned or know. I acknowledge I am in Dk and things stick different, but I need a sweet escape.. a pocketful of sunshine in my hands....
mmmm
And I am feeling clueless and fragile this time of the year.. although I am sure I will feel much better after I get some ZzzzZzz.
Good night !
XoXo,
R.